I don’t need to do the same thing every day at the same time.
My idea of routine is a little different. For a lot of people with autism, their routines are strict schedules that make things difficult when they get derailed. The most important thing that determines how well my autistic brain is going to handle my day. All this just to go to a coffee shop and work on an essay. If I don’t sit down now, I’m gonna go nonverbal. As I’m ordering, I avoid eye contact (costs too much energy), mess up my script, order the wrong thing, can’t ask for something different, noise is getting too loud, lights flashing, my hand starts shaking. About to order? Script your response 10 times, no 20 in your head. Which one has the least amount of light shining on it? Are any of the bulbs flickering? Everything is at the same volume so its all equally too loud. Which seat is away from the most people? A corner is preferable. So here I am, walking in, I need to scan the entire place. I need to make my shortened amount of energy last an entire day of tasks and things to be done. But when I’m alone, I don’t have that energy to spare. This would result in me having to rest and recharge after a few hours of socializing. Now if I was with friends, I’d sit where they wanted, do what they did, and use a lot of my energy to not be a trouble. Sitting in a cafe as I am right now is not an easy task, although I love the atmosphere.
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